Alexandra Norrskèn (N.S.) (lantichristo) wrote,
Alexandra Norrskèn (N.S.)

New beginnings ...

So I am on the fourth floor.
The button on the elevator has the sigh of a lil doll.
I have a rather big balcony.
I can look quite far far away into what seems to be a forest. (I need to explore)
My room is big.
I had to cover quite a lot of stuff with black satin and velvet to cover colors.
I covered the curtains too some how. I always find a way.
Clean and tidy bathroom with big bathtub.
Rather inviting corridor I say.
Small kitchen but very functional.
I like that I can see far far away from all the windows. The old apartment view was rather suffocating. I was peeping on the neighbors all the time.
Now It's trees and sky as far the eye can see:) OKAY! There ARE some depressing suburbian buildings. But only in shape. They have a lovely deep red color. It fits the green around them.
No pictures yet.
I kind of downgraded on the camera department temporarily so I'm not gonna be taking a crazy amount of pictures until I sell my loud speakers in order to buy my camera. (my old camera i think kind of died. The batteries don't work ... hmfff)

My land-Lord (or else, roommate :p but I like to call him mi Lord :p) is very clean, tidy and very well mannered, thank Lord of Pestilence and all Evil!
He has a sister so that kind of explains it.
Men who grew up in the same house with a sister are almost always more clean, tidy, and well mannered than those who grew up with brothers. I don't know why. But my statistics give always the same result. So that's good for me.
I hope he can tolerate my O.C.D. and several other small "obsessions".
So far so good.

It's rather chilly in here. I'm used to a very hot apartment walking around half naked all year so this is rather new to me. I gotta find appropriate clothes for indoors. See-through dresses are not appropriate in many ways now are they?!

My plants don't seem very happy in here. But it is only the first day. We'll see. I hope my cacti are doing better at Henrik's. (He knocked Spiky down a couple of times but no harm done.)

Well I feel rather lonely here though I have to say.
It's because it is quite far from the city and all my friends live so far away from me.
And I still feel really weird being here. I don't really feel I live here yet. Right now it feels I'm visiting. Along with all my stuff.

Well it's gonna be okay.
It'll all be okay in the end.

There is someone new ... however, it's still too new and to good to be true.
I have my reservations.

And still feels weird to just un-love someone. Someone I loved for so many years.
I guess it is some sort of defense I have.
I've even written about this a long time a go.
About the unconditional love ...
I can't love someone that doesn't love me back. It's like a chemical reaction.
So after a while everything shuts down and I kind of restart.
"Erase and rewind" sort of thing.

Which seems to be the case with my life right now.
I restart.
This is not a bad thing.
It's a good thing.
No more compromise.
Now I'm aiming for the "whole package". Which I thought I had.
You know they say: "you never know what you had until you lost it" yeah?!
But sometimes, just some times ... you never know what you don't have, until you get it...
This is how I feel with him ... my new someone ...

And I'm sure my ex is better off without me as well.

We are gonna be okay ...

Today I'm having drinks with my Sarah.
A lil celebration for new beginnings

Mazel tov!

Tags: dear diary, moving, new apartment

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.