Alexandra Norrskèn (N.S.) (lantichristo) wrote,
Alexandra Norrskèn (N.S.)

Dear diary.
So I went through a thing.

To make a short story long...

A mouse was in the house.
I knocked on the neighbour's door for help.
No answer.
One could easily die here, noone would give a rat's ass. (pun intended)

I meet the creature in the kitchen.
It ignored me.
For 45 minutes it went about its business trying to bite into jars and stuff.
Meanwhile I was screaming like an old lady in a rollercoaster. It's hilarious you should have heard me....

In the end, it even looked at me, straight in my face. Came next to me, climbed my dog's water bowl and peacefully drank water as if I did not exist. It was almost adorable.
But no.
I was angry and disgusted.
I thought, any minute now, it is going to climb up my leg, enter in my asshole, eat through my intestines, and come out my eye socket while chewing in my eyeball.
Yes, too many movies. I know.

Meanwhile, my dog never saw the mouse. She just saw ME freaking out, so she now and then would go and bark at the door. Duffus Maximus.
Yeah, she is not the sharpest knife 🗡 in the drawer.
My vicious pitbull 🙄 My ass!

But the mouse was TOTALLY unafraid of me.
I got offended! I DID!
Yeah, nothing offends me. But a mouse ignoring my terror! Well THAT I don't stand for! Because I was REALLY scared.
Too scared to actually take pictures of it while it was ignoring me, in fear it would escape while I was too busy taking pictures.

So, I gathered all my offended pride into one move... and I trapped the motherfucker in a bucket. I added some weight on top of it to make sure it won't escape, and waited for my friend to come and save me.
Yes I was a damsel in distress and asked for the manly man friend to come and save me. What do you want from me? I'm a city person, I had never even seen a mouse before I got together with Magnus! (Magnus is in Stockholm in the apartment in my room, by the way. Safe and mouse/rat free)
So our friend Mattias came to the rescue!
He came and he got a carbord piece to use under the bucket, and he lifted the thing (you know, like you do when you want to save a Bee 🐝) And we walked across the field and set it free. :)
Well.... We had to SCARE it away. Because it refused to leave the bucket. The fucking cocky mouse!
It wanted to stay with us!
I got so offended and angry! 😡
But the asshole is now finally free on the field, to go terrorise some other farm.
Hope it is not coming back here because THEN it WILL die!

Then I internet searched a bit and found out that there is a parasite that gets into a rodent's brain and can make mice fearless.
It's called Toxoplasma gondii.
"... Toxoplasma gondii spends part of its life in a cat’s gut, then spreads to mice via cat droppings. It invades their brains and causes them to behave fearlessly towards cats – quickly returning the parasite to a cat’s gut and completing its life cycle."

Soooooo... I learnt something today....
Tags: animals, country side, dear diary, funny, offended, scary

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